The practice this week is a simple one, so simple in fact that, more often than not, gratitude tends to get forgotten in favour of far more pressing concerns that plague us; anxiety, anger, judgement, negative self-talk and other traits that are focused exclusively on what is wrong with our experience, rather than what is right with it.
Recent research conducted by Lyubomirsky (Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Riverside), shows that 40% of happiness is determined by our intentional activities. People who keep a daily “gratitude journal” or who regularly express gratitude to people who have been kind to them show a significant increase in happiness and decrease in depression.
Instructions
At the end of the day write a list of at least five things that happened during the day that you are grateful for. At the end of the week read it out loud to a friend, partner, or mindfulness companion.
Reminders
Keep a notepad and pencil or pen beside your bed or on your pillow. When you go to bed at night, write your list before you lie down and fall asleep.
Please Spread the Word
Image courtesy of aussiegall
I must say that it’s going to be a struggle today to find five things that I’m grateful for, but I shall think long and hard and find something, however insignificant it may seem !
Tessa, I’m sorry you had a stinking day :-( I’m grateful for the little smile of recognition I had when when I saw James’ dentdelion pic. He he. Also grateful I got a parking spot right outside the office, it wasn’t raining when I took the dog out to stretch his tiny furry legs, my loo flushes at the touch of a button (it broke earlier this year & I had to fill and pour buckets), the taste, convenience and perkiness of Hot black (instant)coffee with sugar. That’s my five-a-day for now. Hope tomorrow brings many reasons for you…
whoops forgot to tick the ‘notify’ box. Do I need to send another comment to tick it? Best do that anyway…
Thinking about it today I realised that the secret is to be grateful for something as it happens, in that moment. Then when you look back you remember the moment clearly.
Being mindful in the moment again, haven’t I come across that before…
Yes, I think that’s right – so we need to keep our ‘gratitude radar’ switched on. Rick Hanson (Buddha’s Brain) says that ‘good’ events are harder for the brain to remember, because we are preferentially wired for survival – i.e. to notice what’s wrong/bad/dangerous. So we really do need to actively notice noticing good stuff, and allow our neurons to wire together to form a memory. That way, we gradually build ‘neural architecture’ that makes the process of ‘taking in the good’ more natural. I got chatting to a cheery fellow dog walker on Wandsworth Common just now. He was wearing wonderful purple trousers. If I ‘take in the good’ of that pleasant woodland chat (complete with a glimmer of sunshine) then such moments will hold more power for me in future. I might even react to that colour purple with a smile if I see it in another context. I appreciate that such talk may be too ‘behaviourist’ and Pavlovian for some, but it makes sense to me :-)
Neurons that fire together wire together! Gratitude lists follow the same principle as the pleasant event sheet in the 8 week course; the more intention and practice we put in to notice positive experiences….in a very real sense the more of these experiences we start to have. Furthermore the greater the frequency of positive experiences, the less room there is for the recursive, negative, difficult stuff to gain a foothold. Neuroplasticity / building neural architecture in action. The pendulum of course can swing both ways and neural architecture can get stuck in recursive, negative patterns (depression, high states of anxiety) so, one of the tasks of mindfulness practice or more specifically MBSR & MBCT is to provide people prone to ruminative thinking with the skills to notice when the pendulum starts to swing into the red so to speak, and also the resources to notice that before it becomes too entrenched or in the case of clinical depression, a relapse.
Yup – neurons that fire together wire together. So, using our consciousness, we are both creator and created? Can anyone here recommend any guided meditations which are specific to gratitude? I’d be v grateful :-)
And here’s a recent talk from Rick Hanson that dropped into my inbox on this very subject….
Hello. May I join in? I’ve really enjoyed your exchange, above. I’ve been keeping a gratitude journal since January 1st, and often sit for several minutes last thing at night with my pen poised over my notebook, trying to summon up three things. Helpful tip from Melissa to switch on one’s Gratitude Radar, be grateful in the moment, be aware of being aware, and that reflects what Rick Hanson says about letting the good moments soak in. It’s Sunday morning, deep blue sky outside, cup of tea next to me and the day stretching ahead. I’m soaking it in.
Hi Susie and a very warm welcome to the blog. May I ask….what has it been like to keep a gratitude journal since the beginning of the year?
Here’s another small but delightful short film about Gratitude narrated by David Steindl-Rast.
Welcome Susie :-)
James – Huge thanks for the introduction to David Steindl-R (Brother David). I looked at his website and this interview jumped out – and in particular, this part:
BROTHER DAVID: Deep down there is only one faith that all human beings have, and that is that deep trust in life. Even our body expresses that trust in life by always taking another breath. We can’t even stop it. We can’t stop breathing. So that deep trust in life—that is what all humans share, and that expresses itself, then, in a Buddhist way, in a Christian way, and even in ways that we don’t recognize as explicitly religious. Many atheists have a deep faith. They all have that deep faith, but they express it very differently.
OLSON: Beliefs are not faith, he says. Faith is deep trust. And the opposite of faith is not doubt, but fear.
BROTHER DAVID: The one most frequently repeated command in the Bible is not “love your neighbor,” but “fear not.” And if there is one thing that we need in our world, if there’s one thing that we should write on our mirror and see every morning when we look into the mirror, it’s “fear not.” If we went into the day with that command deeply tattooed on our heart, “fear not,” we’d be completely different people and create a completely different world—a world of faith.
The transcript is better than the video, in my opinion, but I won’t tell you why! See both here: http://www.gratefulness.org/brotherdavid/video.htm
It’s been a great Gratitude week – the longest ever gratitude diary I did was about 3 months. Susie – are you planning on going for the whole year? I would love to hear more about your experience so far, and your plans.
My Gratitude Buddy is not well this evening :-( we had planned to share our diaries with one another, but will wait til she is well. Get well soon dear GB. Lots of love.
And thank you James for the e-book – I look forward to reading it (while listening to the kitchen tap dripping?!)
Thanks James and Melissa. It’s late so I’ll be brief, but to answer your question – I do plan to keep the journal up all year, I actually look forward to my moment before going to sleep when I have to complete it. It has a subtle effect – not least that it’s a tiny moment of pure positivity just before I sleep – but already I feel that’s made more powerful by discussing it with you. I don’t know about sharing the contents with a GB though – it seems too private for that (and too banal!) – but perhaps I’ll get over that. One of my three things tonight will be the fact that I’ve joined in your discussion.
Susie, it was lovely to read that you’re making joining the discussion one of your things to be grateful for. In fact, so lovely that I’m making it one of mine too :-)